Wednesday, July 23, 2008

I was reading a post about why someone blogs and I could not help but agree with her thoughts..In a nutshell, because you can totally say what you think. 
Her goes. 

I am struggling with my parents coming out for a visit. Originally, they had planned to come out in July and spend about 10 days with us and then a few days with my step sister who recently moved to Palo Alto and is more recently going through a divorce. Suffice to say, I was surprised when I called to chat one week, and my step mother mentioned that they would not be able to come out..They had wanted to go to Tanglewood with friends and also come out to spend time with all of us in SF. Since the prices of everything had gone up so much, Tanglewood was the only thing they could afford to do. This was the same call in which I learned that my step sister was now getting a divorce ( there had been no sign of this coming ) 
I was a bit surprised, and I realize a moment later, a bit hurt. Thankful that my stepmother said what she was really thinking, but sort of struck by the choice. 
In the past, my quick response would have been to suggest paying-for the ticket, hotel whatever. Instead, answering honestly as well, I let her know that unfortunately, due to starting our business and our fertility treatments we too were a bit strapped. 

At the same time, I so wanted them to come out. Last year, spending time before and during our weeding week was really meaningful and I long to have us all spend more time together. Knowing the past and creating more of a connection as a family. 
My suggestion, was to figure out how to perhaps use miles for the trip, and that I would look into this over the next week or so. Thinking more about the dates, I was honest about when it would make the most sense for us to have them come..Scott and I talked and thought more about what we wanted the week to really look like. So here we are now. 

I have not made any calls to the airlines. I have thought countless times about the week and what it could look like...I have felt the pain of them not, for once, just getting on a plane and choosing to come out instead of something else. Why is this, and why has it been a pattern for so long. 

So now, I get ready to call..To see if there is a way that I can move us closer to what I believe we want and what none of us seems to have the courage to do. Acknowledge the love that I feel and the hopes that I have. To act from the heart. To talk about what is there. 

To them, not just to you. 

1 comment:

Claire, said...

Whoa. I'll have to read that again later unable to concentrate I got caught up in my own emotions about very similar issues. Thank you.