Love and Loss

A close friend of mine was diagnosed with cancer late last year...A surprise to all of us, as she is young, kind hearted, practices and has learned about her yoga practice in a complete and loving way. I was so sad when I heard the news originally through a good friend, and have held her in my heart and thoughts for the last year. I did not realize until today how afraid I am of losing her, or anyone I love. Why is it that the fear of loss, heavy in my heart causes me at times to pull away.
We have all experienced loss and pain, and have nursed friends and family back to health or closer to death in a loving way. Is it the loss of my own mother so early on? First to the disease and then to life itself? Was it the shielding of a child, the absence of honest conversation and feelings that causes me to be so good at moving on.
It is no longer who I want to be. I want to be there, every step of the way, loving, losing, and experiencing. I don't want to hide behind the to dos at work, or logistics...But it is hard.

Her life has been a rich and loving one. Her birthday and every other day is a true gift. Live Simply, Love often, Face fear and never walk alone.

Tonight a small birthday celebration and more a celebration of living a connected life.
To my life partner, thank you for continuing to show me the way.